Awesome Pawsome!

ABSOLUTELY TIRED.

But really damn satisfied. (:

Thank You Everybody.

damn fucking angry.

want to dig a hole and sleep inside til monday comes.

fucking hell.

It'd Happen Sooner Than You'd Expect.

Here it goes.

My uncertainty thread has been cut loose; his lips spoke the dreaded numbers I wished I never had to hear.

Of course I'd rather it come now than later, so I have ample time for mental preparation and adjustment.

Now I'll just count down to the days time and distance will set us apart,

while I helplessly attempt keeping everything we've had within my grasp til then.

19July.

That's less than a month. =(

Repetition

When you wake up from a peculiar dream the first time,

it feels awkward, but you laugh it off after you tell the people involved.

But when you wake up from that same peculiar dream the second time,

it's not funny anymore.

There must be something wrong.

oh.my.gawd.

I am seeing stars from all the numbers, names and colours.

"......., that’s why we are so frigging awesome. "

(photos from Chow's FB Album)

Saturday;

A major frozen yogurt craving led myself to Jco as recommended by JL which tasted ten times better than it looks. The Ahgong wanted to furniture shop so we headed down to Park Mall where we wow-ed at the jacked up prices of H.erman Miller furniture.

Then we celebrated Eugene's 21st with Bbq food, 8-player soccer on a PS3, ice cream cake, and too much beer.

S does a reaally awesome job with instigation which landed himself in the hot seat with Mal. I can't remember who won but I (though not involved in the drinking game) won myself a driver's seat in the Stream later that night because of that.

The game then got modified with coke for Halal friends and chengteng for drivers and 2-year-old vodka with beer as it went on. It even involved school pride, and sexist issues, etc etc.

Sunday;

As usual (for now, but not anymore). Lunch with S and sister at A.ston's, Novena for coffee from Starbucks, picked cousin, picked Daddy, F1/Discovery Turbo at home.

Dinnered at Newton (the cheng teng was so yummy!), caught H.arper's.

And then. Water works.

S was initially confused/slightly frustrated but ended up laughing at the situation.

I don't know if it was to make me feel better about it or because he didn't see the severity like I did. But I hope it's the former.

Woke up bright and early at 730am for training of which the Birthday Girl decided to attend at 2300 the previous night so we couldn't get cake. Coach wasn't around so it was more light hearted and we water breaked longer than our drills. SHH.

Jean and I lunched with Angie before we went up to her room for some cheesecake lovin'. :D

Was so tired I could fall asleep anywhere by 4. :(

CP meeting was slightly awkward but very productive albeit taking more than 3 hours. We tried XinWang Taiwan which was surprisingly pretty good(: Cheaper and better than the HK one anytime(:

We managed to shorten Seniors' Camp to 1 day! Ended just in time with S' training so I joined the boys for dinner at BK with some Mos Iced milk tea(:

Woke up aching entirely today :( And need to start doing up Fixtures. :(

But it also looks like my rushed week is a tinybit more relaxed with Seniors camp shortened by half(:

You don't miss your water til the well runs dry.

PREMATURE.

The Lasts of everything are always amplified.

Half the time they always hurt.

The Last Goodnight,

The Last Goodbye.

The Last Train Home,

The Last Flight Out.

The Last Kiss,

The Last Fight.

The Last Word,

The Last Step.

The Last Walk Home,

The Last Breath....

The Last.

They bring the end to everything and anything; a conclusion, a finale.

Yes, the end is where I begin. The end is the beginning of something new.

But fuck it, I don't want this something new.

I hate interruptions, I hate adapting. I'm inflexible, and I've found my comfort zone.

I don't want to learn something new, I don't want to cope with something unfamiliar.

I may not be directly involved, yet it seems I'm the only one so gravely affected.

I'm ashamed to see how S is ever so confident, ever faithful all will turn out well.

Just like how he assures me, "Things will be fine", even though they turn out otherwise 90% of the time.

So premature, so exaggerated.

This feeling of being robbed, where the theif removes your most valuable things, while you watch him do it helplessly.

Uncertainties, they haunt you like a recurring nightmare.

The effect of an uncertainty, like a multiple-chanced guessing game.

You get it wrong, try again. You change your mind, think harder.

It's the little things that are insignificant yet so very impactful that mean the greatest.

It's like losing a side of your contact lens; my security stripped from me and I'm left to fend for myself.

It's the weekends; and they mean the most to me.

Things will never be the same again.

And I'm hanging on a loose thread. Waiting for the numbers from your lips that will snip this choking cord of uncertainty. These numbers that will count me down to the future I will henceforth dread. These numbers that will pull me further and further from this present I will never have again.

effgeed(ing).

We have been friends for almost 7 years now.

I remember how we met: the first time at the stadium. You in that yellow/grey uniform on the upper stand, leaning over the railings to talk to us below.

I remember the first time I saw you cry. It made me scared, and it tore me up slightly. But I just didn't show it.

These seven years have taught us love, lies, trust, life, value and priorities.

I dare say there was once no one else knew me as well as you did.

And I am ashamed to admit I've let you down before.

But I'm not regretful of the past, and how it led us to where we are now.

Externalties are not within our control.

Of course I always want the best for you, both of you.

Because both of you were just as important.

We have been friends for almost a decade now.

These years have seen us through every bit of life; teenage-hood, victories, love, school, trainings, break ups, failures.

I remember the times you'd sneak up and surprise me at the staircase to pass me stuff.

I remember how you sound when you whine.

I remember how we held each other and cried together when we fell out of love; at the same time.

I remember how we would laze, watch tv and forget about the world.

I remember our terms of affection; and I liked how you'd call me ______ .

I don't remember how the tables were turned.

I don't remember when you took a turn in life without taking me along.

I don't remember how the J word could be at the tip of your tongue whenever the conversation topic was Me.

I've always wanted to talk to you about it but I kept putting it off. Part of me didn't feel like it, the other part tried convincing myself it would be for the better.

But I cannot understand it sometimes. As much as I do try to.

Of all people, you should understand best, I do stand by this belief. Yet, you are unexpectedly, the first person, to not trust me, or her.

I don't know how else to say this. (I don't even know if you will see this.)

I'm so weary of watching her pull her hair out over this.

It shouldn't even be happening.

The End.

The hardest words to type (for me) are: research, and scientific.

I always get a certain one or two alphabets in the wrong place.

Today concludes my daily travel to Pulau N.TU either for training/work.

PHEW! Finally get to rest. I hope she gives me a week break before calling me back. Heh.

=)

"Bathing in Hot Water gives you Saggy Breasts."

After the usual training/team lunch today, we headed to a secret Sausage warehouse where they had a huge variety of hotdogs/ bread/ cheese, and cheap Florida fruit juice/yoghurt (&drinks)/ ice cream. We bought a box of 6 Fruit bars to share, costing each of us 1$ only and it was so super yummy. We tasted strawberry chunks and everything tasted so pure and natural. Hahahahahaha.

Made us 5 happy girls on a super hot day. =)

Accompanied JL to the IndonEmbassy where I had to sit and wait due to inappropriate dresscode. No slippers/shorts/berms allowed. MUST wear covered shoes and bottoms longer than your kneeees. Took a long, hot walk down to Wheelock to check out the pretty Tigers but they aren't there anymore. :( Then we joined the crazy crowd at Mango and bought the same thing. HEEHEE. DON'T WEAR TOGETHER PLEASE. We made up for lost time/conversation the past 4 months (it passed so fast, it doesn't feel like it!) and ended up with dry throats. (: We then had dessert after dessert and more (window) shopping (:

But I'm old and my legs cannot support my weight (ok Al, you win. I'm Phil the Fatty/Patty; whichever works. Heh) so we kept sitting down and retracing our steps for the past 20 years of life. Got slightly carried away so the dear girl was late for her dinner date but we had fun (:

9AUGUST, Jieling! You'll be back real soon(: And I know the semester is gonna be exciting *winkwink. Poor Angie is gonna miss out! :D

Sick And Tired.

WHERE ARE MY EVERLASTSSSS!!!!!
They have mysteriously disappeared and I want to wear them :(


Anyway, caught Ghost of Girlf's past today and it was so-so for me. Caught P.elham 123 with Arthur, Ahgong and S after W.araku dinner last Friday. The dinner was rather last minute and impromptu, we assumed each other would inform Y. In the end we were "waiting for her" while she didn't even know she was supposed to come. :( Wanted to go for more foood (like durians at G.eylang or BCM at Thomson!) but we decided to curb our unaccounted hunger pangs/cravings. (:



Mommy stitched my mogu (: Yay.

Fallen From Grace.

These scars we wear remind us
The more we change
The more we're all the same
Swept up in this emotion
We fumble through
and make the same
mistakes
Cause' we are led
To the edge

Carry me down
Roll it in your arms
Cause' I can't remember
Ever falling this hard

******

It has been quite a while since I hit this space.

I just had dinner with a 9 year old at the dinner table a few hours back. Watching her eat reminded me (and my mom) very largely of myself about a decade ago.

How I like my rice wet and my potatoes smashed; how I liked it when Mommy cut up chicken and pork chunks so I don't have difficulty chewing.

This 9 year old and I are not related, neither have we known each other for long. But we're close. She sleeps on my bed, hugs my elmo, wears my tshirts (which becomes dresses), tags along for my meeting and meetup, holds my hand when we're out, shares our favourites and secrets when we lie in the beds next to each other.

And I love her to bits(:

Been supercraving for durian/durian puffs lately all thanks to PrezAw.

Made S drive all the way to J.oochiat to get some which fell short of expectations (which were built upon the reviews). We were then enticed by the BKT which resulted in us getting a parking ticket... >=(

Today after a terrible friendly, we met KWANJIELING who is back from Indon for (less than) a week. =) It was just the usual 6 of us; whom I've missed much. But it was good time together. Felt no different from a sem ago where we gathered for CNY steamboat reunion/welcome Phil back from NZ/ HTHT dinner. As usual, we spent lotsa money on food, food and more food. A little bit on shopping, and forgot to take many pictures. But it was good happy time. Topped up the Happy juice. (: Yay.

Back to work tomorrow. =(

Mogu

My mogu exploded on Thursday and I was literally sleeping in snow. =(

.

so fucking tired and my knee is going to give way.

i'm out for a week.

Burnt Lips = Flamed Words Spoken.

I am tired beyond description but I need to suck it up.

The season has FINALLY (three cheers!) ended after the 3rd/4th playoffs yesterday. We won (un)convincingly with the score of 5-4, but we definitely played better than the numbers reflect.

It is, without a doubt, how much we have grown as a team, and of course individually.

With the initial days of playing in Bgrade and eventually Agrade.

House meetup later in the day was disappointing with only 10 but nice nonetheless.

With good food and good company, what more can we ask for? (:

6v6 carnival today with S.tormcats (Ro!!) and the organisers conveniently changed our team name. We turned up with a purpose, achieved it, and took away much more than we had expected.

I'm really really proud of the team(:

Dinner at A.ston's! Yay! :D

Also, Ash found bottled Pocari sweat from the seveneleven at Turf today.

It was, as usual, over priced though.

And S.oderling's ass is getting kicked by F.ederer. :(

Ok. F.ederer just won.

Goodnight!

-

Today, this could be the best day of our lives.

But it could also be the worst.

Something broken is never the same as before though it can be fixed.

Weekly Team Dinners.

I dived over a barely healed open wound, opening it further.

It's so gross and I didn't even get the point for touching down.

Had my teammates pile over me and my visor hit off my head.

But at least "that was a good dive". =)

We had to sit separately for Team dinner though, but it was still nice anyhow.

Usually it's just 5 of us. But today it was 9. (:

The swollen finger still hurts.

-26 SEPTEMBER 2009.

THREE MONTHS, TWENTY FOUR DAYS TO GO.

Whichever You Prefer.

Training on Wednesday was "Back - to - School" themed. We all came dressed in our JC jerseys and we were reeeaaallly colourful that day. It made training look bright and happy but the fitness/drills totally killed whatever was left.

We forgot to take pictures so we took this while waiting. (:

Thursday(night) was spent with no other than my favourite people from schoool. =D

From Prata to intended ice cream at I.cekimo (which was closed by the time we arrived), and then to prawning til 3ish. We spent more than 10$ on snacks to last us through the night, and caught a grand total of FORTY ONE PRAWNZZZZ.

Slightly into the first hour, we realised our net had many huge holes and thus 2 luckyshit prawns managed to escape. :( But we were on a rolll the next two hours and Brudder even caught a KING PRAWN!

It was definitely much more enjoyable than the first time I went. Somehow we couldn't get used to the amount of strength to be used so I managed to send two of the prawns I caught on an insane Reverse Bungee ride, concussing them as they hit the walls on the side. Chong even tangled up our rod with the lamps hung up.

We had fun feasting, but we finished them all up in less than half an hour.

Nothing tastes as good as when you've caught/cooked/earned them yourself. :D

Site recce on Friday was awesome. It was short, sweet, SPECTACULARR. We were in total AWE of the place, and it was so much nicer than what I remembered it to be..

Really. Awesome. (:

Then, that night, Mommy brought home her Third Daughter. (HAHA) Some little cute p3 kid who stayed over for the night. Both of them were sooo caught up with their Facebooking games, I was quite speechless. My mom is 5* (secret! hah!) and the girl is only 9!

Saturday; had an awful breakfast. :( I didn't get my waffles and everything was just so bad. Then we had our semis. Really important game. Victory would have been sweeeeeet, but we didn't work hard enough for it. The first time we played this team, we lost 4-2. Then we drew 3-3 the second time, and finally won 4-3, earning ourselves 2nd place in the table.

Yet, during semis we lost 5-4. It was so so close, the pressure was intense, everyone was flustered. It didn't help that we were screaming at one another, but the opposition deserved to win based on that 40 minutes. Tragic, but true. =(

Made my way down to S.omerset Residences to celebrate Liu's 21st! It rained and thus ruined the party plans by the pool and everything reverted back to the room. The birthday boy had pretty cupcakes in place of a birthday cake which was kinda cute. (Since he's a boy!)

Woke up bright and early for Funtouch today. We won! Black berries. Haha.

And the rest won u21 girls too! Even the Turf Babe was from our team, so awesome stuff.

Hate astro burns/ sun burns though. And yes, my middle finger is swollen from a boot-kicking action from I-can't-remember-who. =(

Caught T.erminator just now. It is definitely one awesome action packed film.

But it kinda made me nauseous. =(

Back to touch tomorrow with taped up fingers. AGAIN. Oh my. 4th consecutive day of Touch tomorrow. :( OK STOP WHINGING. Goodnight.