This is Quick. But Not Quite Painless.

The thing about ego/pride; 

it is just like a one-sided window.

On your side, all you see is the reflection of self.

You think about how you are always right and hence disregard those on the other side of the window.

But we, on the opposite end, can see through the window. We're not just looking AT you, but INTO you.

This window; we want to smash but cannot bear to or it'd hurt you too deep.

This one thing we can never learn to swallow or let go; it may protect you but it hurts everyone else around.

I watched P.okemon just now,

and I thought it was quite funny.

-

I am so tired =(

Al let's go jb to eat and watch movie! We can ask Teacher Khoo.

I Am Perpetually HANGRY.

Monday; belated Birthday meet up with the newly-turned twentyfirst.

Intended swimming session turn laze-by-the-corner-and-catch-up, til the lifeguard forbade us to leave as we "talked more than we swam".

Soon, Touch is going to occupy more than half of my life per week.

As if that is not already new, I'm beginning to grow more and more weary from it.

Trulymadlydeeply can't wait for S.TL to end, it has been much of a pain than a pleasure.

With the growing expectations, increasing demands, and heavier responsibilities, even the slightest things that may seem insignificant to another weighs twice as much on my shoulders.

SIGH.

Where is my short holiday to anywhere?

JustForFun.

"Which guy from GG would be your boyfriend?"

*

*

*

Your Result: Chuck Bass
You attract the "bad boys". You would be good with Chuck Bass. You don't seem to care where your boyfriend is or what he's doing. Whether he's out partying or with another girl; you don't keep tabs on his whereabouts. You are outgoing and free spirited and aren't afraid to stand up for what you believe in. Go ahead, you deserve that motherchucker. Just don't expect him to say "I love you" anytime soon.

Interesting. But I don't think I'll ever date someone like him.

Though I DO LIKE HIM (!!!) as a fictional character.

Ok swimming tomorrow with the birthday girl. Goodnight world.

"I Have So Much To Say!"

Yes, I am officially year 3 with the release of results on Friday.

I remember frantically logging off before it was 12 so I would refrain from checking my results. 

I didn't give S a chance to speak when he called by screaming "DON'T TELL ME! I DON'T WANT TO KNOW!" repeatedly through the phone. Funny.

Anyhow, I've officially completed HALF of my University education.

It has been quite a journey, with changes and new beginnings to anticipate at the start of every sem; something different to look forward, and next sem is no different.

Another two years to go til graduation (NOT looking forwardddd), but also another two years with T.rojan, and another four semesters of exciting chapters to unfold.

Holidays on the other hand, have been insanely occupied with trainings.

Yeah, ok like what's new. For the whole of last week, F.oc / T.ouchattack planning has consumed much of my braincells and energy. It has been almost a month since I was "stressed up".

But all is well and three cheers to that.

-

I AM OFFICIALLY YEAR THREE.

AI

I'm listening to No Boundaries by A.dam Lambert again and again,

and I still don't understand why he didn't win.

Although I already expected it, but this time  I was really hoping I'd be wrong... =(

Snooze.

Today, I woke at 0645 hours, and travelled all the way to Pulau N.tu.
Now, I'm a "Visiting Professor" for 24 hours, (ok maybe less)
and I'm totally freezing in this room, (my fingers feel so stiff)
while listening to TheAcademyIs/LadyGaga/BritneySpears/LoveSexMagic.
Thank you all for entertaining me. =)

to the N.USBFF: wooot alf, free skins :)

I have so many emails to send,

so many emails to read,

so many inbox messages to reply.

BUT I DON'T FEEL LIKE.

Sulks. :(

OMGGYOURESORETARDED

My beautiful mistake gPhone. says (11:52 PM):
*n hor
*i kinda like to throw the phone into the bag
*i see u do it..n it looks fun

the end is where I begin. says (11:52 PM):
*HAHAHAHAHA
*omg that is sooo retarded

My beautiful mistake gPhone. says (11:54 PM):
*wat?
*throwing into the bag?
*u do it all the time wat
*n i find it amusing when u always dig for the phone

*but my phone is always there!! it cant disappear..cos i have to put it there carefully each time..

the end is where I begin. says (11:58 PM):
*hahahhahah
*fine!
*its good to take care of your things
*dont anyhow throw!

My beautiful mistake gPhone. says (11:58 PM):
*but it looks fun
*fuck where's my phone
*nabei la. i cannot find my phone
*i cant say these

NOCTURNAL.

I'm becoming nocturnal, not that I want to but I can't help it.

I don't do enough to tire myself to head to bed and I don't need so many hours of sleep.

My brain is barely used, except when I'm playing bejeweled or typing emails.

ZZZZZZ.

Sunday come faster please.

twentysecondmayisdoooomsday.

(mentalblank)

Today, I had impromptu lunch date with the N.USBFF! (: 

ROWENAKHOO WAKEUP WAKEUP! We wanted to call you but figured you were still sleeping. (:

I also learnt (not for the first time) that tomyam + bubblet = stomachache.

We were searching for Hope in N.tuc and around the neighbourhood but there was no Hope! :(

Tonight is also the night, I've never ever felt so cornered/insulted/offended.

I'm honestly quite hurt (and I've whined to a million people about it) but I'm so hungryhangry now I've no mood to blog.

No H.arper's Island = good nights sleep.

NO FOCMEETING TMR = HAPPINESS (: Heeheehee.

Plan T.ouchattack = Big Headache.

Take Back The City.

Jay-see-are-see photoshot from really long ago.

They were always in my other room and I only got them back recently when my tenant shifted out. Plus, insane packing and shifting after my last paper on 30th. S and I cleared the room in less than two hours. Which means, I said my final goodbyes to Thirteen, and I'll never see it again.

It is bittersweet though, as always with all farewells. I hate this place, even though I had an adventure here. It was Thirteen that I grew closer to Eli bitch, where I met wonderful people like Zq the awesome Pres, Sc the bestie, Faz the wonderkid, where memories of Gdine coming over/us sleeping in are kept, memories of FFF and I. This is where I spent 70% of my Freshmen year (the other 30% in school and at training), yet I never quite had a good feeling about it, nor the people. Thirteen is where I had a first-peek into the real REAL world, the pretentious people, the friends-for-benefits, etc. (Too ugly to continue)

But I'm also thankful for the people that have kept me sane; for Chong, for Gibby, for Shaochun, for Elisaliuwenbin, for BrudderKang (who lives in the neighbour hall/block), for Shooo, for Wonderkid, (yeah and unfortunately no girls). 

The one and a half year stay would have been worse without you.

Anyhow, we concluded a while back that I was giving up second best for third best in terms of luxury/comfort. And as much as the future is bleak and intimidating, as uncertain as it may be, (especially with the recent turn of events), I can only hope it will be a completely different but better year to come. In a different place, that is.

*******************

POST EXAMS:

Can't stop whinging about how brrrroke I am, haha.

My current income is 40/week, of which I feel severely underpaid cos I run til my legs ache so bad and I get backchat(ed) by stupid 16 year olds who think they're so good.

Sent Ycube the manager off last Thurs at the B.udget terminal. It was almost empty, haha. And  she's back already, back at work too. :(

Then I had my starbucks fix before I cut my hair(:

Caught Monster vs Aliens on Friday, it was so stupid. And effectively slept the other 50% of my Friday away after lunch. 

Was draggggged out for a movie last min by A.rthur, who just booked out! We caught H.orsemen which was freakingsick and made my insides turn. Felt completely nauseous towards the end and they still had the mood for supper. =\ Geyland serai BCMeesua. 

Barely slept and hence had difficulty waking up on Saturday for Touch. Was initially sat out for Womens game so I wasted my cabfare. >=(

But Nic and I played second half anyhow. Played mixed again, against P.irates.

And followed Suuuuuu home to shower before the Sg/Kazak game at Y.ck(:

Very good mothersonny bonding time we had. (:

Dinnered at Ikea after the match with S and family, then caught W.olverine. Not too bad a show(: 

Sunday with MrsDarcy,

As usual, lotsa food, lotsa fun, lotsa laughter, lotsa silly moments, spend lotsa money (ok not really), talk too much, take too many pictures. (: 

Monday, training training training. EK COME BACK SOOON :(

Tuesday: Waffle fix from G.elare, yay(: And catching the last hours of the DEbraced boy before he leaves for Germany.

Refereeing again, training at Turf again.

The whole field was gross-muddy-smelly-dirty-sick.

And I've pulled out of A.sianchamps. Makes everything alot easier now. (:

So after the crazy sandfly bites attack, I've weird rash around my legs and arms now.

Freaking fields.

My Legs Are Damn Tired.

I need to stop watching H.arper's Island at night so I can go to bed without freaking out.

.

I've had ear phones plugged in for almost two hours now, but no music was switched on.

Neither am I watching any videos.

Yet the restrictions the wires have bound between me and my lappy have made me lazy and confined to this small space.

I am such a bum.

PS: Jokes for the day:

A: "Do pigs fly?"

......

A: "Yes.. Cos Swines flew..." (Swine flu)

V: "Which animal will die in the Arctic?"

J: "Is this another one of the s.wine flu like joke?"

V: "No!! It's a brand name"

...................

V: " (very excitedly) Ok let me tell you the answer!!!!

Cow!! Cos Niu bei leng si. (N.ew balance)"

Us: -____________________-

_

I do have alot to say,

but my brain's either too tired by the time I get home,

or yet to be awake when I'm online in the morning.

So many things to do in prep for Bkk and I hate planning for overseas trip on my own. =(

Every Teardrop A Memory.

We wanted to pick a secluded spot,

but the only good place left was right under a street lamp.

We sat side by side in silence, with our knees tucked in.

The more she tried to keep silent, the more clearly I can hear her heart shatter.

She lowered her head on my shoulders, like a sinking ship; slowly, dangerously, helplessly.

I wish I could say something to lift the pain, but I couldn't. I was in no position to.

Things, especially truths, are the hardest to accept when they are least expected.

Subconsciously, we are always seeking answers to reasons we cannot fathom.

Who are we to decide what is The Best for another?

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

I am not afraid of repetition, nor monotony.

Just afraid of helplessness.

PS: I have no patience; goodbye ponytails and hello short(dyed)hairphil. (:

PPS: I have been overeating. :(

+

To a certain extent, we are all influenced by our surroundings; the decisions our friends make, the things that happen to them.

Sometimes we ask ourselves, "When will it be me?" - it may be a blessing that has yet to fall upon you, it may also be a catastrophe you want to avoid.

Sometimes I'm afraid I let my personal judgement get in the way of making decisions for my friends. Something I feel is best for them, may not necessarily be the best for them, or be what they want the mostest. Sometimes I fear I relate too much with personal experience, as the foundations may be contrasting for the involved parties compared to me. Sometimes I dare not speak too much, yet the silence kills the heart further. 

Anyway apart from training,

plus Tuesday shopping with YCubetheManager +Nuaing at D.onut Factory in Novena,

then rushing to Ref Oh-F-S games, and more training,

and having dinner every day after 11pm,

life has been prettty boring.

ok, xoxo.